


Luminary

by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel



Category: Dogsbody - Diana Wynne Jones, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Awesome Phil Coulson, Dogsbody fusion, Gen, Stars, idek, well sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-19
Updated: 2013-08-19
Packaged: 2017-12-24 00:29:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/932990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/pseuds/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘It could have been worse,’ is Philip Coulson’s motto for the first half of his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Luminary

**Author's Note:**

> _If you've read_ 'Dogsbody' _by Diana Wynne Jones, you already have an idea where this fic is going. If you haven't, well, hopefully this will still make sense?_

_ ‘It could have been worse,’ _ is Philip Coulson’s motto for the first half of his life. He’s born with his eyes open, bright and clear, into an ordinary middle-class life with unremarkable, but loving parents, and for a long time almost nothing happens to him. He grows, and learns, and becomes part of the interconnecting web of humanity and Earth, just another warm body on a planet full of them. Phil knows he’s unique down to his bones, in his blood, in every cell, that tiny bit different from every human being who came before him… but in that he’s just the same as everyone else, which takes away some of the value of it.

From his earliest memories Phil dreams of a dark, comforting void, of a small bright satellite revolving gently around him, and vibrant blue light that radiates far into the darkness. 

Phil reaches adulthood without anything much happening to him, and promptly rectifies this by joining the army. He makes a friend there, the first true friend he can remember (that isn’t _quite_ a lie) and the two of them are sent to places where the earth has turned to sand and the light of the sun burns bright and hot.

Other people complain about how bright and sweltering it is, but Phil just squints against the light, and bears the heat with fortitude. It could be worse.

He gets used to the sun’s constant presence, felt so much more keenly than at home. Sometimes, on the rare occasions when he can find a moment to himself, a quiet moment alone, he talks.

The first time, he hesitates, stands for a long, uncertain moment of silence before he says, “Hello, Sol.”

When he blinks against the brightness, he can almost imagine a shining figure in his dazzled vision, watching him. It’s ridiculous, of course, but Phil smiles.

“Nice place you’ve got here,” he says, and falls into thoughtful silence for a minute or so. Then he adds, “Thanks.”

The sunlight seems a little brighter, just for an instant.

“What the hell is your obsession with the sun?” his buddy Marcus asks him one time, when they’ve returned to base camp and are basically done for the day. Phil shrugs.

“I’m not obsessed.” 

“Bullshit,” Marcus declares. “And don’t try and tell me you don’t watch the stars, either, because I know you do.”

Phil tries to smile, and fails.

“It reminds me of home,” he says finally. “Gives me something to hold onto.” He refuses to say anything more.

It’s a habit he keeps, his watch of the stars and conversations with the sun, even when Marcus turns out to be a man named Nick Fury Jr. and the two of them end up in an organisation called SHIELD, and Phil’s life _genuinely_ becomes interesting.

Phil learns once again to blend in, hones his blandest smile and buys a wardrobe’s worth of suits and ties, doesn’t try to stand out anymore. Instead, _not_ standing out becomes his greatest gift, as he moves in and out of places where he shouldn’t be and no one gives him a second look, and he’s on the scene the moment something happens, knowing that no one will remember him later. He’s just another guy in a suit, balding a little, unexceptional to the eye. Phil finds satisfaction in the fact.

The only thing that stands out at all are Phil’s eyes, a brilliant, serene blue. But that’s fine. Phil likes his eyes exactly as they are.

Even now, he still dreams.

When Thor’s hammer comes down in the desert, Phil has to work hard to stay composed. On the inside he’s vibrating with excitement. Phil has always known that the world ( _universe_ ) is bigger than humanity really knows, but maybe, just maybe, their self-contained little reality is about to expand.

Thor isn’t around for long, but the legacy he leaves behind is very real; SHIELD knows for certain that there are other worlds beyond Earth, now, world teeming with intelligent life, and begins to prepare for them.

“We need to look to the stars,” Phil says cheerfully, and grins when Nick casts a suspicious eye in his direction.

“Dammit, Cheese,” Fury says grumpily. “Why do I feel you’re one step ahead of us on this one?”

Phil shrugs, smiling.

“Couldn’t say, boss.”

“Sometimes I feel you’re being completely literal when you say that,” Nick grumbles, and because he’s turning, misses the way the smile vanishes from Phil’s face.

Phil is there when the Project Pegasus base collapses, the Tesseract stolen by an alien intruder. He’s there, too, when the Helicarrier is invaded by its own brainwashed people, trying to get Loki back. He’s there when Loki is about to eject Thor into the sky. This time, he decides to intervene.

“Move away, please,” Phil says politely. Loki is holding the spear, and something about it, something about the way it gleams a brilliant _blue_ calls to him.

Loki moves away, eyeing Phil cautiously.

“You like this?” Phil asks pleasantly, indicating the oversized gun he’s carrying. “We started working on the prototype after you sent the Destroyer. Even I don’t know what it does. Do you want to find out?”

“I think I have a better idea,” Loki says from behind him. Phil whirls, Loki’s illusion vanishing, and the spear comes to rest above his heart – 

_ Blue. _

Phil blinks at Loki, and slowly sighs. The god smiles, bright and sharp, while Thor bellows in grief and rage beyond them.

But buried deep within Phil, something not Phil begins to stir.

Phil follows Loki towards the quinjet obediently, glancing at the bright light of the sun in the corner of his vision.

“ _Zoi,_ ” some inner instinct prompts him to breathe, barely audible, and the sunlight sharpens until Phil blinks and boards the aircraft.

Phil hasn’t slept since the moment Loki invaded the Project Pegasus base, too busy, but with Loki’s permission he falls asleep on the plane.

He dreams again of the void, of familiar blue light, but something is different, this time.

Phil dreams of the Tesseract.

_ Sirius _ wakes up.

Loki has his own private base, full of people, but there, at the centre, is the Tesseract, shining a vibrant blue. And for the first time, Phil _knows._

“You know it’s powerful, right?” Phil says, and Loki smiles, condescending. 

“Of course.”

Before Loki can stop him, Phil reaches out.

The moment the Tesseract – the _Zoi_ – is in his hands, Phil remembers how to use it. He’s thinking with a tiny fallible human brain made of flesh and blood and electricity, but some things are never really forgotten. And Phil knows this Zoi, has used it so many times over billions of years, that using it now is simply instinct.

Philip Coulson falls away, and all the is left is Sirius, shining brilliantly blue, his wings fanning out behind him, scorching the paint where they sweep across the ceiling.

Loki stares, open-mouthed and horrified, while the men and women under his control stare in wonder.

“Angel,” Selvig breathes disbelievingly, wonderingly.

_ Luminary,  _ Sirius wants to say; but human beings are not made to hear the voices of stars. Keeping himself dim and cool enough not to do them harm, even this far from his sphere, is taking all of Sirius’ concentration.

Instead, Sirius manipulates the Zoi, and all of Loki’s enthralled minions are suddenly free, and there is a roar of rage and pain directed at Loki, who looks like he doesn’t know what to do without the power of the Zoi behind him.

Sirius twists the outer later of the Zoi, and Loki is just an ordinary human being. The former god gapes in dismay.

“No!” Loki howls, and tries to throw himself at Sirius, only to backpedal hastily when he finds himself singed.

_ Yes,  _ Sirius tells him sternly, and the humans wince and cover their ears, while Loki screws up his face at the unanticipated pain. _Consider this your punishment, Loki Odinsson._

“That’s not my name!” Loki wails, clutching at his ears, and Sirius looks beyond him, to where the body of Phil Coulson lies, vacant and dead.

Sirius hesitates.

Being human was a punishment, true, for something he hadn’t done, but his human life has become unexpectedly dear. And these humans – this little organic satellite of Sol’s – need him, in a way that his own barren patch of space does not.

_ Oh, hell,  _ Sirius sighs, and tells the Zoi what to do next.

Phil gasps and splutters to life, chest heaving, coughing as stilled blood begins to pump through his body again.

“ _Shit,_ ” he groans, and sits up, still holding the Zoi. Ignoring the stares of everyone else and Loki’s heartbroken sobs, Phil walks outside, making a few alterations to his body as he goes.

He stops and stares up at the sun, and smiles.

_ You found it,  _ says Sol. _I wasn’t sure you even remembered you were looking for it. Can you change back, now? I thought your punishment should be ended._

“It is,” Phil agrees. “But my business here isn’t finished yet. Can you mind this for me?” He holds out the Zoi, shining with most of his power, towards the other luminary.

Sol looks startled, but reaches out hesitant fingers towards the Earth, and takes the Zoi from Phil’s hands. His touch burns a little, but that’s all.

_ Are you sure?  _ Sol asks, holding the Zoi carefully. _Human lives are tiny and fragile. And this is a great responsibility._

“Ask me again in about ten years,” Phil says, and smiles.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a photo of Sirius taken by the Hubble telescope, and the light from it looked blue. You can see it [here](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Sirius_A_and_B_Hubble_photo.jpg). It's quite brilliant and beautiful.
> 
> I know I've deviated from Dogsbody canon quite a lot, you don't need to tell me. This was more of an 'inspired by' than a true fusion, I guess.


End file.
